Worship/Romance/Testimony

“You shall not make for yourself any idol, or any manifestation of what is in heaven above … as an object to worship.” Exodus 20:4 AMP

I’ve been a romantic long enough to know that romance is hollow. It is a real and tangible object, but it, like every other earthly offering, is too weak to lean on.

Romance can certainly be physical intimacy with another person, though physical intimacy can exist without romance. Even still, romance cannot be without connection. For too long I’ve romanticized every relationship in my life except for the one I have with God.

I’ve connected freely and openly, without reproach, holding back nothing, with romantic interests, friends, even customers; I have, however, somehow neglected the deep connections with God and family.

I… idolized friends, not because I thought they were impressive, or beautiful, or spiritual, but because they bothered even to look me in the eye. I idolized any connection I had. I’ve idolized relationships every step of my life.

It’s been about a year since I invited God to start working on this in me. I ended a romantic relationship with the revelation that I was simply being let down and not receiving the best that God has for me – again. I’ve done little to take my relationship with God and search out its mysteries. I’ve done nothing to find God in the remote places, and instead have looked to other people to fulfill my loneliness. Only when I’ve received this romance from others have I looked to God – no more; bloody no more.

Who do I obey, and which desires do I give my will over to? This question brings us back to the topic of worship. To worship something is to serve it and to mind it. Above everything in my life I minded my relationships with others as the answer to my problems. I did nothing to serve God, myself, or my family. I  served only the purpose of creating connections to satisfy my self-hatred and stress born from my lack of applied faith.

“Now Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen… Without faith it is impossible to please God… Whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.”

Love, Frederik

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